A brass fastener

 My girls have been using their imagination a lot lately. Which isn't really appropriate to say lately, as they always do.  I should say cape's have been a big part of inspiration, lately. They fly around the room watching their blankets float behind while I'm usually warning them, "Look where you are going!". Sometimes their inspiration comes from what took place recently, either a story, or book they read.

On Monday morning, Claire approached me saying, "Mom, betend (sic) you were laying their dead, and then I be a guy who just walks by, then another guy that just walks by, and then another guys walk (sic) by but I give you a drink from a cup like this..." as she (without moving her elbow, only her shoulder) demonstrates how to move her arm a bit robot style to the imagined mouth.

You cannot see the little arm that moves by a little brass fastener in her Picasso colored picture, but it moves the cup up to the afflicted man's mouth.

So it got me thinking... I am so thankful for sweet teachers who take the time to copy, cut out, prepare and donate a little brass fastener to make it "movable". It may seem like a little thing but in Claire's book it makes it extra special. And in my book too.

A Tip for Tuesday

So I have a set of four of these. They have been reinforced at the hole punch and laminated if you can't see from the photo.

(Look at that nice wrinkled duvet cover from targets Rachel Ashwell line. Should have paid more attention to the lack of wrinkle-free on the package. I hate that thing.)

I made the tags large so they are noticeable. It's strange I know, but in our house things need to be noticeable to be noticed -- or they aren't. ???

So part of the girls school year Saturday jobs are to pick out clothes for the week and hang one of these tags on the clothes for that day. Saturday and Sunday labels don't get used as often as the other ones...

1. I don't care about Saturday mornings usually. But if we do have something to get out the door for then it helps to pick it out before. 

2.Sunday is done as a group usually. 

(I'll tip on Saturday jobs and Sunday groups soon.)

To do this on Saturday it means laundry needs to be done on Friday.

Or Thursday when I know it's a crazy Friday.

Or Wednesday...

Okay... at some point laundry should be done.

So..... if you don't have laundry done then they end up pulling out the ratted and torn jeans. It is ironic for the above photo to fall here, this is not an example of ratted and torn. I paid good money for these to be "distressed".

My dad once offered to wear out my jeans for me when he heard what I paid for some "distressed" jeans.

He's a really nice dad.





Wow, look at the glare on Wednesday's photo. Yuck!

The girls know I have ultimate say on outfits and obviously the two little ones assist me as we pick out items.

Ultimate say = a mean mom. 

Dear Elizabeth seems to think if you have a brown top you should wear brown pants. Poor thing doesn't understand when I say it doesn't match, "But they are the same color, Mom!" It really doesn't make sense does it?

And then you have McCall. She would wear jeans and t-shirts every day even though at the store she loves and wants to buy the skirt, the blouse, the chic sweater - so mom has to remind her I paid good money cause she LOVED this sweater and she's going to wear it!

So do you want to make these for your kids? You can use my template here.

1. Print on card stock.
2. Hole punch before you laminate.
3. Laminate if you didn't figure that out from step 2.
4. Re hole punch laminate if you didn't figure that out.
5. Put a little ribbon to hang them by.

Side Note: So when I was laminating the lady at the counter started raving about the idea and as I tried to explain I was sick of picking things out the night before or morning of (for my girls), she cut me off and started going off about how nice that would be to make sure you didn't wear the same thing in the next week, yada yada yada. I left wide eyed and slightly embarrassed, for me or her, I am not sure which. She thought all those sets were for me in my closet I guess!

Monday and manners

So I have a great respect for our youth, I think the world of them and know that they are capable of amazing things. I have high expectations, but so does the Lord. I talked to a primary leader recently who told me about a struggle with children in our primary and tech toys. She explained the hardship leaders face with these devices.

We had considered a device for McCall, but worried she wasn't completely ready. It prompted a conversation with a primary teacher who was telling me about the struggles with her class and the attention being taken and time spend trying to revert attention back to the lesson and away from the device.

I know it's one of those "grey" areas where a lot has to do with parents - where they are at and how they feel. But when it disrupts a teacher, a class or a primary, YM/YW, it passes beyond the parents feelings I believe. We can completely miss the mark and talk about the good these gadgets can do, and good people who use them. For adults who have been taught and know how to use gadgets properly, it is acceptable to use them in a church setting. (Albeit many adults miss the mark on proper use too!)

But what about the youth? When are they responsible enough to know when to use and not to use these devices?

It got me thinking about what the real problem is. It is not the devices themselves. You could believe that any device is incompatible with anything close to good manners. I disagree... it's the people operating them. For our youth, it's the same problem we face with so many other issues today. Lack of teaching, guidance and follow up on behalf of the parents.

Etiquette is basically about paying some attention to the convenience and comfort of the people that you interact with. Whether technology is involved or not, the basics of good manners apply. "Technology doesn’t cause or contribute to breaches in manners, it just put a new face on old symptoms of inattention,indifference,or boorishness."

I'll step off my soapbox now. :)

Update: Peterson Factoid

Just an update from this post.

It's been 3 years and I'm sure you have all wondered and worried about how we are doing... right?

Erik has doubled his miles.

I'm not quite as close.

But I actually feel good about the increase because it has all taken place in the last month, so I'm moving in a more consistent direction, and that is what counts right? Even though it had been two weeks since I exercised last (when Erik asked me Sunday night how my exercising was going). I think he noticed my numbers remaining stagnant for the past 2 weeks. Maybe two weeks on, two weeks off, isn't so bad...right? 

Oh...And can I just say the p90x guy is so annoying ("Pam or BaBam")! But boy howdy, I could hardly move for those first few days!

Leading with Love

LEADING WITH LOVE:

"Nothing is so much calculated to lead people to forsake sin as to take them by the hand and watch over them with tenderness..."*

As I thought about all the mistakes I make on a daily basis, as a wife, mother, friend and especially in my calling I thought of the difference kindness makes. Sometimes I feel sick over how apparent my sins and shortcomings are (and I'm supposed to serve the sisters when I am so full of error?). When I read the above I thought about the difference when people treat one another with love and those who seem to want to criticise and find error with every move someone makes. I see the difference in those who look for good and find it and those who are waiting at an instant to take something said or done the very worst way.


I think one thing that has been the hardest about my calling right now is that some people think that leadership puts you in a position to judge. We hear that some will be a judge in Israel and that's true but at times I feel like sisters want to apologize to me for shortcomings, I sometimes want to say, do you think you have to explain to ME? Me who is so full of sin and error? Do you think I can judge you? I'm having to stockpile forgiveness from the Lord, I can't afford to make apparent my beam by pointing out others mote!


I don't think that I was a judgemental person before, but I can really see how this calling has helped me to see the gold which is in everyone, to not take offense, because you just don't know the history, how someone was feeling and what was going on when something was done or said. It has helped me see that we are all just trying to sort our way through.


I am so grateful for the people in my life who have lead with love and set the example; for a husband who wants me to be the daughter that Heavenly Father intended me to be, for a Bishop and my presidency who put up with me and all my errors and accept my offering even when I know I should be doing so much more to help, for friends who see my faults yet love me anyway, and for my daughters who love me and who forgive me when I have made mistakes.

*From: Daughters in My Kingdom

Exterior Erik and I agree on... it's this or a classic all brick. (Click on picture to see full screen.)

Comment from the most amazing Jess on the House Plans...

"Yay!! You're blogging again! :)

Ok, so I probably have too much to say on this, but you said input is welcome so here you go!

In your girls' bathroom, do two sinks instead more counter space. Lauren and I are constantly waiting on one another in our bathroom when we're getting ready. It would be soooo nice to have two different areas. I know, we should be ok with being patient and sharing, but if given the choice I'd pick two.

I like the second kitchen best, but the third kitchen makes me think "Aunt Ashley" the most.

You should do curtains on the lockers in the mudroom. You can still "hide" what's inside, but you'll also avoid smashed fingers in cabinet doors when the girls are in a hurry. Plus, more design variety and color with fabric!

I love love love the idea of a seating area underneath stairs!! I can just see awesome imaginative ways that little girls could play there, and a little Peterson girl curled up inside reading a book or something. So cute.

You may have already thought this through, but have a "teenager" space. I know your girls are young, but I'm assuming you'll be in this house for a good while. I love having friends over to my house with my parents home because it is the easiest situation to make good choices around my friends, but we don't really have a good "hang out" place in our house. It definitely shouldn't be a totally closed off area, but enough that younger siblings won't disturb excessively.

I miss you guys!! Love you all! -Jess"

We really want teen feedback because that's exactly what we are moving for...

1. Yes, we will keep with the two sinks, good call.

2. "Aunt Ashley" makes me feel old. Erik and I just had a conversation about this. I was at dance and most the mothers were talking and graduated in 2000, and for the first time in my life I felt like the old mom! :)

3. Never thought of fabric - nice one designer Jess! Maureen said to do doors, and I started wondering that I considered having it all open to start with.  Even if it is one of McCall's regular jobs to clean the coat/backpack/shoe storage each Saturday morning, it still is such a mess all the time.

4. I think the seat is the most fun too!

5. Teen Space: Love your feedback. We removed the bonus room because it's a pain to keep warm/cool and we want two separate furnaces for main and basement and I don't want a third one up, plus bonus rooms sometimes are too remote and closed off! Plus we want to die in this home so it has to be good once all the kids are gone! We don't want too much space when they are all gone. I hope that we can make it workable with the two family rooms up/down, then younger and older can be separated. We considered having two girls share so we can use one room as a play room until 1. McCall goes off to BYU in 8 years (ouch!), or 2. the girls don't need a designated TOY room anymore! I'm also trying to negotiate a disco ball in the dance/exercise room cause I can see the girls playing there for hours, it's just those darn mirrors for the walls, they are expensive! We would do french doors on the entryway so a parent can always see in! In the craft/office space (up bedroom) I want wood so we can get our craft on, I see friends in their too, maybe we should do a great window seat or a comfy love seat in there so there's a place to hang? Thanks for getting me thinking, we really want our kids at our home and I'm trying to select carpet and flooring that will make it a place people will be comfortable - we don't want a home where food can't be enjoyed in the family room!

Thanks for your comments!

Negotiations

 So it's no secret that at our home we love to create. The girls love play dough, they love painting, stamping, stickers, coloring, beading bracelets, making potholders, cross stitch...

You do get the idea, don't you?

 So very often the girls are asking to do one of these items but it's not everyday that we can halt everything to do it. They take a long time to get everything out, then put it all away and clean up - so it's much easier to get out coloring books or something.

So the girls get REALLY excited for paint and glue and dough...

A. Because they are messy.

B. Because they are messy.

C. Because they are messy.

 So very often (almost daily) Claire will ask "Can we paint today?" Yes, sometimes it's "Sure!" but I often say to her daily requests, "not today", or "not this morning but later this afternoon when the girls are home", or something like that. 

To which Claire responds... "Okay Mom, what can we do?"

With her bright eyes she follows up with my options.

"Can we paint a picture or go outside and swim?"

(That was last Thursday. Do you know how cold it was last Thursday?) OR maybe "Can we play with play dough or go to Thanksgiving Point?" Claire then sincerely adds to the end of the question with palms raised questioningly,

"Which one Mom, which one?"

Sometimes it's a treat.

Claire: "Can we have a granola bar?"

Mom: "No Claire, it's almost lunch/dinner."

Claire: "Okay Mom, so which one, can we have a granola bar or a fruit snack? Which one, which one?"

OR

 Claire: "Can we have dessert tonight?"

Mom: "Is it Monday?"

Claire: "No"

Mom: "Is it Friday, Saturday or Sunday?"

Claire: "No"

Mom: "Then you don't get dessert"

Claire: "Okay Mom. So which can we have, can we have a cookie or go get ice cream? Which one Mom, which one?"

Steve Jobs

Steve Jobs

1955-2011

"Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.”  -- Steve Jobs 

Corning Glass Museum - NY

We attended the Corning Glass Museum in NY.

So amazing! 

We got to see beautiful works of art and then some amazing technology and hands on science for the kids. The best was a glass football shaped room. With a person sitting in each end all you had to do was whisper and it magnified and seriously sounded like you were speaking in surround sound. 

Do you see the tree? 

This was probably my favorite piece. Made with thousands of tiny glass threads.

Click on image below to see tiny strands.

Watching the presentation of the glass blowers. The two guys ended up dropping the lovely glass vase they just created - but the crash really made for some excitement!

Brock, McCall, Joseph, Matt & Stella's head.

Jess, Claire, Lauren, Ben

Elizabeth and Julie

Stella, Andrew and Tiffany

You may wonder what we were doing in a glass museum with four kids but they were pretty good and we had amazing aunts, uncles and cousins (especially the fabulous Miss Jessica and Miss Lauren) to help us out.

Lake Ontario - NY

June 2011

When not tromping around the 13 acres of forest my Grandparents lived on this is how I remember our time visiting each summer in NY. Foxes, rabbits, deer, my grandfathers bee's, fireflies, oh and don't forget poison ivy, were scattered among the forest surrounding his home.

The tree's are amazing, landscape lush and green everywhere. You'd see a field that wasn't plowed for a couple years and tree's would be sprouting up all over the place. You can see the thickness just beyond the waters edge.

Lake Ontario always felt like the ocean to me as a child, which it could be as you cannot see across it. Playing at Hamlin State Park, minutes from my grandparents home, was a tradition and it was great to let my girls experience this. Of coarse we cooked at the beach the very best hot dogs you'll ever taste "White Hots".

 

Peter Whitmer Farm - NY

 After working the Joseph Smith Farm my Great Grandparents were asked by the church to come to work and take care of the Peter Whitmer Farm. Above is the home they lived in. It was great to sit outside and listen to the story of my great-grandparents and life at this place.

The Peter Whitmer Log Cabin sits across from the white farm house above.

 All of the 21 Stoner Grandchildren. It was such a beautiful experience being together on this trip.

Palmyra - NY

My Great-Grandparents worked and lived on the Joseph Smith farm while my Grandfather was a boy. This was where my Great-Grandfather and Grandfather labored and toiled. How amazing to plow the same earth, to tromp around the grounds and be in this sacred place where such important things happened for mankind. 

The Palmyra Temple

The (Replica) Cabin where the angel Moroni visited Joseph Smith Jr.

What cute cousins!

Stell Bells

Claire - Smiling despite the heat and humidity.

Elizabeth with a hint of attitude in that pose - what a goof!

The rebuilt home build for Joseph Smith Senior and Lucy Mack Smith.

The Sacred Grove:

You don't have to travel here to gain a testimony of what took place, but there is no denying the spirit and the sacredness one feels here. There is an opportunity, as you walk the quiet path, to ponder what took place. God the Father, and His Son, Jesus Christ did appear here. God loves us. He continues the pattern set for over 4000 years in the Old and New Testaments of revealing His word and His plan to his children. THAT is what the Book of Mormon testifies of. Of the continuation of the Father's love and His hope that we will follow the Plan so that we might be with Him again...forever and always.

 Hill Cumorah

Poor McCall: She has the worst mother ever who packed denim Capri's, and a lightweight cotton sweater over a tank for this day. She was by this time hot and irritated with her mother for such poor planning.

We love all the cute cousins and the sweet girls to look up to.

Looking out from atop the Hill Cumorah is such an amazing and wonderful experience. It really is a beautiful area but those early settlers must have had such a hard time hacking it out and clearing the land! How cool that somewhere in this hill the angel Moroni turned over records of gold to aid in the restoration of the Church of Jesus Christ. I am grateful for the worthiness of the youth Joseph Smith, Jr who was able to do this great work. I love the Book of Mormon and it has borne me up and strengthened me and guided me so often. I cannot deny it's truth and worth.

Rough Morning (Part 2)

Some of ye are wondering what we did with Stella and Claire after the incident here. Well Stella is just a little lopsided for now - the poor girl is over two and still has less hair then P.Olsen - for crying out loud!!
(P.Olsen is a darn cute baby in our ward - my husband comes home
bragging about her each month when he visits her at home.)

 And as for Claire... I trimmed off about 3 inches off the back, on the bangs I trimmed about three spaghetti size chunks of hair that were longer than what she cut the rest, otherwise, I have left them completely as she cut them.

PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF PETE:

DO NOT TELL HER SHE LOOKS CUTE...

EVEN THOUGH SHE DOES!

Greater Focus

I love conference!

Okay, who doesn't and every year I could profess that the "talks were just for me" or "the talks were so good this conference" or "the Spirit was so amazing" or "I'm going to do so much better".

I'm going to do better is what I always feel when sitting and listening. I see the Gospel so clearly, I see the simple beauty in it and see what matters most. I see my faults and see what I need to do better. I'm going to be a better mother, more patient, I will be a better wife, I'll be a better visit teacher - I'll really serve my sisters and their families. I'll be a better RS President. I'll spend an hour each day serving the sisters in some way. I'll be more Christlike all the time. People will see my faith in Jesus Christ, they will feel my love for him by seeing the way I live and the way I treat and talk about others. My scope becomes broad - worldwide - rather than the narrow scope I see with most of the time. What are my struggles? Look around you Ashley. I'm going to do something great - something worldwide. I feel that I can do anything, that I can overcome anything.

No wonder conference is so powerful when we sit and experience personal revelation for our lives.

Then Monday comes and real life starts again and within the first day I seem to have completely forgot what I felt so strongly only 24 hours before! Why is that!

Moses went into the mount and came back to a people who had completely lost vision and focus. I guess that is why conference comes every 6 months. Longer than that and I'd be back to my super narrow focus of me and my, me and my. Twice a year to refocus, realign and recommit.

I am so grateful for this amazing Gospel. For the way the Lord molds and sculpts me into the woman I need to become. For the Spirit as it reveals to me where I need to go and what I need to do. How it gives me a greater focus on who I am and what God expects of me.